Stupid Tuesday

Stupid is a term that is overused practically to the point of cliche. Its technical definition, according to dictionary.com, is: lacking ordinary quickness and keenness of mind; dull. We use it to categorize all manner of the unpleasant and undesirable; animal, vegetable and mineral. It is a term I generally try to avoid, preferring to do as I urge my students, "find another word!" The plain truth is however that yesterday I, a woman of ordinarily above average intelligence,  was stupid. Dim. "Dull".  Allow me to illustrate.

Stupid Tuesday
Scene I Act I- classroom, teachers talk while their charges work

Melanie: My friend said not to put any birdseed out. Have you seen any bears around your house?

Laura: No. I don't think there have been any, although the kayaks have been really bad this year.

Melanie: Kayaks???

Laura: No, I don't mean Kayaks.... crap what are they called.... oh! Coyotes!
End Scene

Scene II Act I - post office
Laura goes to a post office box and produces a key. She opens the box and extracts a huge pile of mail. She sorts through it and discovers a package key. Laura is excited. She loves packages.

Laura: YAY! A package!
She goes to the package box whose number matches the key, number 66. She places the key in the slot and turns it this way and that.

Laura: Come on! You stupid thing, OPEN!!
She kicks the bank of metal lockers and goes to the service window.

Post Woman Beth: Can I help you?

Laura: Yeah, I got this package key, but I can't seem to get the box to open.

Post Woman Beth: Ok, let me try.
Post Woman Beth comes out from behind the counter, takes the key and inserts it in the lock Laura indicates. Post Woman Beth turns the key. It doesn't budge. She's a strong redhead so she turns harder. Nothing.

Post Woman Beth: Hmmm, let me get my key.
Post Woman Beth gets the master key and inserts it in the second slot above where the key to 66 hangs. She turns each key and nothing happens. She tries once, twice...

Laura: (helpfully) Maybe its broken.

Post Woman Beth: Maybe. I guess I'll have to leave a note for the Post Master. Can you come back for it tomorrow?

Laura: Yeah, sure.
End Scene- Where's the stupid you ask? Just wait.

Scene II Act II- Post Office the next day
Laura enters the Post Office, produces a key and goes to her mailbox. She pulls out a package key and a note from Post Woman Beth. The note reads:
Laura,
The locksmith figured out the problem. This is the key to locker 99.
Have a nice day,
Post Woman Beth
End Play

There isn't really much more to say on the subject, except that I hope you all get a chuckle at my expense- L